Well the 4th of July is here and it is time for all of the summer rookies to hit the streets, waterways and campgrounds!
Love this time of the year. If you have the time I highly suggest packing a cooler full of beer and food, going down to your local boat launch with your favorite sun chair, sitting on your ass, catch some sun and make a day of it. You will not find anything more enjoyable than watching John launching his new $40K ski boat..... and $50K truck... at the same time!
Watch John as he yells as his wife Betty for not putting the truck in park that he just got out of. Watch Betty bail out of the boat yelling at John telling him that he is the dumb bastard that was in the truck, not her. Watch Betty and John's things float to the surface that were loaded in the back of John's pretty 4x4 truck. Watch as the truck continues to roll down the ramp and begin to pull the nose of the boat under the water because Betty never unhitched the boat from the trailer like John told her when she got out of the truck to get in the boat. Watch Betty swim to shore telling John that he has never given her an orgasm and has faked it 80% of the time just as the article on Toner Boy stated. Watch as the ass of John and Betty's boat bobs up and down in the water as they figure out what in the hell they should do now, and as Betty tells John about his short comings in the bedroom once again and that she is sleeping with his brother who knows what he is doing because she was willing to tell him what felt good to her. Watch as John tells Betty that his brother used to be his sister and had previous knowledge of the parts. Watch the look on her face as Betty figures out why John's brother tastes like pork when she services his manhood and why he has such big pecks with skinny little arms. Watch as everyone else at the boat launch pulls away looking for someplace else to launch their boats as Betty and John start to slug it out because they realize their new iPhones were in the boat and they can not get on Facebook now, or read Toner Boy's blog until they clean this mess up and get home.
People do the dumbest shit in the world on a launch ramp. I say to you, bring a video camera, make some money, and truly enjoy your holiday weekend.
As for me. Well nothing over the top going on here. Today I am here at what is still work. I say that because in a few days there is no telling what the kids are going to turn this place into once the Mehserle verdict is read. Convicted or not... these kids are just going to make an even bigger mess of this place. Then again how do you ruin a shit hole? They really don't care. They are looking for an excuse to be the vagrants that they are. Always remember my words about raising your kids properly... loud noises and pain. Stand fast to this rule and things like what are going to happen down here, won't. Then again they might all come out here as a family and make this a function that they can brag to their future offspring. How can we deprive them of this type of honest family bonding?
Forward....
This weekend holds.... hmmm... ahhh.... OK. Nothing there either. Damn I am just full of insight today. Tonight... watch the Nationwide race and JR driving his dad's #3 around the track on last time. (If I ever make it home through the traffic!) Tomorrow...... well it's Saturday. That has to count for something. I am not doing anything that I know of, but it is a day that starts with an "S" so I welcome it with open arms. Sunday.... I am going to guess I will be cooking something at some point in time. Hack called and talked about coming out and hanging out with us at one point in the day. That night we will go and meet up with The SC and watch fireworks downtown. Monday.... well I won't be here so that is a good thing! Tuesday is Turbo's birthday so I am sure we are going to get together on Monday and cook and hangout over there. Maybe she won't have to bake her own cake this year! Ma I will bake you one if I have to!
Yeah... the life I lead huh!?!? Don't hate. It is how I roll.
The office is pretty quiet today. The County lifers with 7 months of vacation per year are out of the office today so they can have an extended weekend. They work so hard you know. A few of the squirrels are moving cubes today. For what logical reason, I have no idea. I am just getting pleasure out of watch them carry their cube lives around with them as they wait for the other person to vacate their new area for the next year.
Trekkie just tried to lay a line on me that I thought was funny as hell. He asks me if last year I had helped with the annual notifications sent out to the residents of Alameda County. I told him no and he told me that he will show me later in the day what needs to be done. He said, get this, that every year he has to go down to the mail room and pull notices out that have had changes made to them since they were printed and have new ones put in their place. He says, "And being the head of the division I think that it is time that I hand this task off to someone else after all of these years. I mean what is the division head doing down in the mail room swapping out notices? After all I think that as the head of the division I would no longer need to go down there and do something like that still to this day. Funny how life goes full circle though." I look right at him with an 'Are you fucking kidding me right now?' look on my face and say, "Hmmmm. Yeah. It is funny how life does go full circle." I can see the gears grinding in his head as he starts walking away with a look of, "Geee... I guess that was the pot calling the kettle black? My bad." Damn nerd. How many times was it required that you say the words 'division, and head'? I think after 16 months 24 days 2 hours and 35 minutes that I know who in the hell you are!!! After all you are the lazy bastard who will walk past a person, find their manager, and have their manager go and ask them a question for you just so you can keep reminding the folks what your fricking title is! God people who have never accomplished anything, and then given a sense of authority bug the shit out of me. They act so entitled. Almost like little person syndrome.
Just wanted to send a quick shout out to Tiger. Guess that $750M is weighing on you more than you thought it would. Nice consistent rounds you pud. Yeah... who needs a swing coach? Not you. You're Tiger.
I had setup a Twitter account (Toner_Boy) to see if I could get some more people following this conspiracy theory against me. Guess I am a confirmed twit now. See what happens. Might get more than 30 of you reading it each day. Then again.... maybe not. If I posted a censored picture of Miley like Perez Hilton I bet pervs would come out of the woodwork to see if a strand of fabric or a short and curly is peaking out from behind banner blocking their view and flood my site. You know I am going to try that! Just so when some of these twisted turds do a search on Google it will show up as hit number 387,210,796 and their warped minds tell them, "This is the one! This is the uncensored one I have been looking for, I know it!". No. I have enough of you freaks that read this thing already! Get a life.
Ticket sales are going pretty good for the girls raffle drawing next weekend. There is still time to get yours! They are giving away a $500 prize to one lucky winner. The drawing will be held on Saturday the 10th at the Redbridge House in Tracy. You do not need to present to win. We are also having a BBQ for $20 all you can eat with beer and drinks. As well as a $40 buy-in poker party where half of the prize fund will go to the winner. There will be a max of 30 players so the winner could be walking away with up to $600! The ladies are also having a Bunco party that night after the poker game wraps up. Should be a lot of fun so try and join us. You can get more details by posting in the comment section and one of us will get in touch with you ASAP. Thank you once again to everyone who has bought tickets and plans on coming out and joining us next weekend!!!
Dugard was given $20M in a settlement from the state. Good for her. Sort of too late to say anything will really fix it though, right? So how do they break it to her that they are going to really only give her $8.7M by the time the pull back federal, and STATE tax? Funny how the money is coming from them in a settlement, but she needs to hand a big chunk of it right back to them in taxes. Odd how that works. Don't even get me started on taxes....
UFC 3,982 is tomorrow night. Anyone going to get it? I am curious to see if Brock can come back and put up a good fight after 11 months off. Let me know... I can pretty much bet I am free.
Just found out Hack is coming to get me for lunch and making me waste my food I brought. Dick. Thank you.
Be safe out there this weekend.
Toner Boy
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