M.I.A.

Hello, hello, hello.

Did ya miss me?

Sorry for the vanishing act there this week, but I have been kept busy around work these days.  I know... "Be still my heart!"  No real work, just a lot of falderal kind of work that the simpletons think is taxing around here.

Real quick blog today.  I will try to bring it in under 10,000 words.  So one of my shorter ones, right?  No really, with the Mehserle trial wrapping up either today or tomorrow we are going to be shuffled out of here so the local indigenous people can burn the city to the ground.  Nothing like starting fresh right?  I am not going to bitch either way.... it is paid time away from this port a potty.

We have our fundraiser for the girls this Saturday so I am busy planning a menu and getting everything together for it.  If you are in the area come on out and tip a few back and grab a bite to eat with everyone.  We would love to have you!  Should be a great day.  We will still have raffle tickets on sale until about 3 on Saturday before we hold our drawing for the $500 prize!  Shameless plug, I know.  But the girls work hard all season and us parents try and work hard for them so they can continue doing what they love.  All of the girls really love their time at Athletic Perfection and The SC loves being together all year.  See Foo about membership fees.  The menu will consist of smoked brisket, BBQ chicken, Texas slaw, chipotle pasta salad and black eyed pea salad!  Come get some!

Things have been pretty quiet on the state hospital, I mean work front.  The season ended for them on July 1st so a lot of the appraisers are on vacation this time of the year.  Yeah for me.  That just means I can go and eat the rest of those chocolate rabbits on the one girls desk!!!!

The biggest thing around here has been this damn trial.  All of downtown is pretty much boarded up for Hurricane Loot that is scheduled to hit shore here this week.  What is funny though, the only reason that it looks out of place is because it is in downtown Oakland.  You know... the city parts!  Shit if you drive two blocks over, on any other street in this town, most all of the houses and buildings look the exact same way all year!  It is like they are in pre-trial trim 24/7!  "You never know when a verdict is going to break out that someone is not going to like.  Plus it keeps the hommies from seeing my fo shizzle DLP when it does!  Word."  I thought that plywood decor was a building style for a minute.  For real.

Just a quick request now that I am thinking about it.  After 6.  Can you do me a solid and give AT&T a buzz and have them turn off your wife's texting feature on her phone?  If I get one more, "Do ya miss me?" from Monkey I am going to go over and pee in your pool.  Not get in and pee.  Stand there and pee into it!!!!  She does give a kiss ass traffic report though.  MAWH!  Love ya Monkey!  This service announcement was brought to you by Eve of Samhain.  Get your copy today at Amazon.com!  Or, you can just click on its little picture right there on the left side of your screen.  If you bring a copy of your book to our fundraiser on Saturday Smut Queen will sign it while you eat BBQ and play poker!  Did I mention we are still selling raffle tickets?  Just checking.

Since I have been away, many of you know that Turbo had her 30th version of her 29th birthday.  Happy Birthday Mom!  Best Friend turned 22 on Monday.  Happy Birthday Best Friend!

Best Friend and One-T are in town and going to stay and hang out at the fundraiser on Saturday.  Very excited they are in town visiting!  One-T will be putting on a push up display to help raise funds for the girls.  He does not know this yet, and for those of you who do not know One-T.... it is a sight to be seen.  Trust me.  These are no ordinary push ups.  One-T... YOU DA MAN!  No Smut Queen you perv they are not erection push ups, so put your pen down!  This is not something for your next smut-o-rific book.  Geez.  Have to told any of you about the fundraiser yet?  It starts at 11 or so Saturday.  Just sayin.

I want one!

Jamarcus.... can you pour me a DRANK?  Fricken fool.  FYI - DRANK will not be served at the fundraiser, but there will be beer, soda and water!  Thirsty?  Come on over.

OK.... that is a wrap on a VERY short week and blog for me.  Everyone be good, be safe and until next time....

Toner Boy