That pretty much sums up how not going to Reno this weekend went over with me. Yeah... I was just a grumplestiltskin!
Spent the day Friday playing online poker, which just did not fill the bill for me, because most of those guys play like complete and total assholes! Ended up making money, but it was just not the same. Ass Clown did call me later and tell me that their turn out sucked on Friday when he was up there, so that eased my pain just a little. Did a little cooking for Foo's party on Saturday as well. Nothing much, just a couple of pasta salads that she loves to eat, but it was a nice little filler for my cranky day. Cooking always makes me feel better. But as pissy as I was, they were not my best effort. Sorry Foo! Finally chased to Counselor that afternoon as well to get some duckets for the food I cooked for Inez's party the weekend before and I could tell it killed him to hand it over. Good you big bitch! But Counselor.... You're simply irresistible! (That is the best and funniest video I have ever seen in my life. Counselor... you are one of a kind. Love ya man!)
Hunny was out for the entire day with the 'Bitches' getting a day of pampering and fun kicking off her 40th Birthday celebration a week early! Good for her, and them because it sounded like they had a complete blast! If you do not believe me... friend Ednolb on Facebook and see the pictures for yourself. They are classic! And per Albert, those are the ones that he was able to post!! She left the house at about 11 on Friday and they poured her back in the door some time close to 1 in the morning wearing plastic jewelry and a shot glass around her neck. So pretty!
*Crack*
As I was getting updates from her throughout the day I did some running around with Turbo and the kids once they got out of school and then had some dinner with the folks. The girls and I went home and they pretty much just crashed after their first full week back at school. They have it SO rough! I played cards online waiting for my little boobah to get home from her night on the town. Got tied up in a Omaha game that kept me busy until I hear a crash through the door as the apple of my eye fell through and asked 'Hunny! What are you still doing up?' with a slur. 'Just wanted to make sure you made it to bed safely Hunny.' a told her as I laughed at her current condition. Believe it or not she sat on the couch and filled me in on her night, watched Big Brother with me from the DVR, looked at pictures of her being posted on Facebook by her 'Bitches' laughing until she crashed about 2:30 in the morning, and despite burping up verde and tequila did not blow her cookies! I wrapped up the game I was playing about 3 and shuffled her off to bed before the whirly birds kicked in and she needed to navigate the staircase.
Saturday morning. The sounds of birds filled the air. You can hear kids off playing in the park as the girls and I say in the living room waiting for the queen of the night to arrive and grace us with her presence. We have 2 parties to attend ourselves and Thunder has a sleepover party to go to that night as well. With a stumble of the feet, a flush of the toilet, a twist of the shower knob and a Hi Ho Silver..... here comes Hunny looking like warmed death!!!! She needed to still go out and shop for all three of these events and it was almost 11 at this point in time. The first party was at 12:30!!! Well we did our thing while she was out and got ready to go upon her return. We headed over to the After 6 and Monkey's for Noodle's party and then it was off to Fuzz and Smut Queen's for the dual party for Tay and Foo. After a few beers for me and only a couple hours of sleep from the night before I was running out of gas before my journey really began. I departed the party early for my date with After 6 and Albert to grab some dinner and watch the Raider's game and the NASCAR race from Bristol that I was supposed to be attending this weekend. Once we got back with food After 6 tried to kick it back into gear with some Jack and Cokes, but my tank read 'E'! I sat on the couch and could not keep my eyes open to save my life. In and out of sleep I went for the rest of the night even in the middle of conversations!!! Sad that I can't keep it going on just 4 hours of sleep any more. Must be getting old. Well not as old as my wife, but you get the picture.
Sunday morning came and I know I must have been worn out because I slept until 9! Anyone who knows me is calling me a liar right now. Yeah... 9. Hunny got up to go and get Thunder from her party as me and Little Miss started our day doing some cleaning around the house. Now living in Tracy which has been farm land since the dawn of time you are going to come across bugs and things. It is just the nature of the beast. Well we came across heavy evidence of field mice in the house..... upstairs in the bedroom no less! Well I live in a house full of girls... so you can GUESS the reaction to this! Now the part that gets me is we have 2 rats as pets, and they are freaking out about mice??? So the Sunday cleaning process took on an entirely new meaning as we looked closer and closer the evidence on these little critters got pretty overwhelming. I think my rats are holding raves at night and these little bastards are living it up in our house without paying a fee to us! What gets me though is as much evidence that we found that these little guys are in there is that we have never seen them once! Now I am sure they were there before we took up residence since this house was built right in the middle of a previous Tracy farming field, but how is it that we have been there for over a year and a half and never seen one of these little guys running around? What is funny is any sign of them has only been upstairs and nothing downstairs where all the food is. Well I should not say all the food because we did locate a stash of candy bars under Thunders bed that they were living on! Well once most of the cleaning was taken care of with the help of Tubro, Pops and McLovin came over to have some dinner and took our rats over to their place for a few weeks so we could put out bait for our little home crashers without collateral damage to our own.
Sorry, side note. OK Mo just walked by with a new haircut that is one that Kojak would be envious of. Damn.... you are a girl, right?
Penis is back in the building. Guess he is ugly enough to even keep the bears at a safe distance while in Yosemite.
Obvious is MIA today. Thank God.
Trekkie has not been beamed back aboard just yet. Take your time, please!
They are unaware but I will have a sudden illness on Thursday called Deep Stack No Limit Holdem at the Peppermill in Reno at Noon that I must attend to before it gets worse.
I am already taking Friday off for Hunny's Birthday Weekend in Reno. It is going to be a blast this weekend with everyone, and I can't wait to get the party started!!!! Hunny is going to come up with Albert and Ednolb on Friday morning and meet up with me. Once we get into town we are going to hang out and spend my winnings from the day before and drink until I turn into a Prince in Hunny's eyes. Pace yourself Hunny... I don't want to become too cute, too fast! I may need to call some of my older friends and get some little blue pills if I get too cute!
Saturday we should have the whole crew who planned on making the trip in attendance by that point and then things are really going to cap off her birthday celebration. It is going to be a night of drinks, dinner, drinks, gambling, drinks, dancing, drinks and strip poker back in the room with the wife. No Hack you are not invited! Go spoon with your little friend.
Early Sunday morning, if we like it or not, we are getting out of town early and running to Truckee for some breakfast on our way home before we meet up with friends and family back in town for her actual birthday! Always nice to show up to a party already smelling like you are drunk with lingering stench on you from the night before. Turbo is putting together some cakes and food for everyone to come and pay their respects to the old lady. Ahhh... I mean the birthday girl who will be 40 years young. I Love you Hunny. More than bunnies!
OK..... side note. Ice Shaker just blew ass in his cube! Dirty rotten bastard!!!!!
*Crack* *Rip*
I don't think I can write after that. That was just wrong. I mean he shit his pants like he asked a kid to pull his finger.
Toner Boy
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